Lazy Day

After much argument discussion about which one is better, working life or studying life, I've come to the conclusion that indeed, studying is much better. I mean how many working people can claim a self-declared holiday from 3 hours of classes as i have done today?

Its great to be able to just lazy about at home, waking up to the periodic swishing sound of the fan and the sporadic passing of cars outside your window while still comfortably tucked under your soft duvet. Even though the holidays have just passed, its been more exhausting rather then recuperating for me. Countless numbers of late nights and drinking sessions, waking up after that in time for visiting, not to mention a grueling full day of lab and class yesterday has left me drained. Not my ideal way to start off classes but much needed.

Believe it or not but I've barely even had the time to log onto the Internet, much less surf the usual blogs/sites i normally visit, or catching up with my reading (be it studies or leisure). Fear not tho cos things are starting to get back to normal, and once more i can start having a semblance of an orderly life again.

Just to make sure there's no confusion about my previous post, no I'm not seeing anyone currently and that last paragraph was not written with anyone in mind. Its just one of my fears WHEN i do meet that someone that i like that's all.

I think the most hurtful thing a person can go through is rejection. Sometimes when i think about it, it really sucks to like a person (and i do mean LIKE and not just fall for him cos he's cute or superficial things like that) and not have those feelings returned, no matter how hard you try or what you do, there's no way of getting that person to feel for you like you do for him. A feeling of hopelessness, and all you can do is sit back and just pray one day that he'll return your love. I've had those moments, not very deep or serious, but still the hurt i felt. Imagine a full blown love attack!

Probably one of the reasons why i want to be perfect, so i wont ever face rejection.

Stupid idealism :)

Monday Blues

Nothing much to say except that it was one hell of a week.

One week of non stop drinking

One week of non stop gambling

One week of non stop eating

One week of non stop visiting

In a way i'm glad its finally over, but i'm missing the fun already. Have a feeling its gonna be so hard adjusting back to reality again.


Recap CNY 2007
-someone makes cocktails
-someone was being a bitch
-more people found out about me
-more people accepted me
-won RM200
-drank every single fucking day! (UGH)
-camwhored with my new cam


I find that funny things run through my mind alot (not literally la of course) but too tired/lazy to write them down now. How does one 'dont think so much'?

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Sometimes i feel insecure around people that i like. Its like my flaws are amplified around them, and i'm the kind of guy who wants to be perfect for that special someone because well, i think they deserve it. In a way it puts a strain on the relationship and sometimes its best to just be yourself and see if that person can just accept you for the guy that you are.

Quickie

I'm cheerful today, and its of no particular reason. Was just finishing my jog and cooling down, walking round the neighbourhood with my ipod in hand when suddenly i just felt uplifted. Been trying to find a word that best describe that feeling but somehow i can't.

I like moments like this :)

Happy CNY

To all the people who've msged me in the past but have yet to receive a reply, i apologise for my tardiness. God needs to give me a bigger brain and more seconds in an hour, hours in a day, and day in a week.

Will be going down to Malacca tomorrow at blardy 7 in the morning and i'm still awake and have yet to pack my things up. Just wanna wish those that take the time to check this blog out a very Happy and Prosperous (very important!) Chinese New Year.

Enjoy ur holiday

Anybody up for clubbing next Saturday give me a shoutout!

A Little Upgrade

'There'll be sad songs to make you cry'

Particularly true for me as i have a mild obsession of listening to sad, sappy songs whenever i'm doing my work or just sitting in front of the computer mindlessly wondering around cyberspace, and i fear that its becoming something chronic. After all how many Sad Songs 1, Sad Songs 2 , Slow Songs 1, and so on so forth can one have in their playlist?

Now however, i fear that my condition is going to deteriorate further given the fact that i will be able to start 'emoing' as well even in my car thanks to my kindda new CD player. Yes ladies and gentleman, this big boy finally gets to listen to proper selection of music from now on and not be subjected to the tortures of radio (though entertaining at times la i must admit!) anymore.

Cant imagine saying this but, i cant wait to drive to uni tomorrow!

My Heart Goes Sha-La-La / Kenangan Terindah

Blardy blogspot finally forced me into switching over to the new version! Dont quite have the time to browse through it yet so i'm still impartial about it. Lets just hope they've not changed too many things, i'll hate to have to start figuring things out again.

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Although just completing a 5 hour karaoke marathon stint last saturday, i'm afraid that session only fueled my obsession all the more! Who wanna teman me sing?!

Caution: Might be subjected to torture.

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So the sad news is that Muse tickets are all SOLD OUT! Come on people its only 2 weeks before the concert, whats the rush! Where on earth is that Malaysian spirit of procrastination?! Sad and dejected, me and my friend now contemplate on bringing chairs and sitting outside the stadium as they perform. Pretty sure that the experience wont be quite as electrifying as being inside that place tho. Unless of course any of you kind souls have extra tickets and wanna sell it to me :)

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Samsons - Kenangan Terindah


aku yang lemah tanpamu
aku yang rentan karena
cinta yang hilang darimu
yang mampu menyanjungku

selama mata terbuka
sampai jantung tak berdetak
selama itu pun aku
mampu tuk mengenangmu

darimu….
kutemukan hidupku
bagiku…..
kaulah cinta sejati…

bila yang tertulis untukku
adalah yang terbaik untukmu
kan kujadikan kau kenangan
yang terindah dalam hidupku

namun takkan mudah bagiku
meninggalkan jejak hidupku
yang tlah terukir abadi
sebagai kenangan yang terindah

Just a song that has been playing on loop for awhile now. I guess its best to leave the past as that and just hold on to the memories. Dont think he'll ever know how much i ache inside everyday thinking, holding back the tears whenever i recall of what we shared. But its best to leave it as it is, the past. I have my reasons for doing what i'm doing and i dont think anybody will ever understand.

He finally took me off the list.

Namun takkan mudah bagiku
Kenangan terindah

Of Rubbish, Fantasy And Gym

So there i was driving to uni when suddenly something caught my eye in the rear view mirror - black bags were falling off this rubbish truck behind my car. As those bags fell, they burst upon impact and suddenly its raining rubbish. I would have been so damn pissed if i was the one behind that truck. Thank God i was in front, so i was just amused :P

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Once upon a time someone drew me a fantasy,
Of a place far away where we would call our own.
Where coming home meant hugs and cuddles and kisses,
And bedtime meant listening to the rhythm of him gentle breathing.
Dinner spent with each other on the sofa with astro,
And mornings spent fighting for the use of the toilet mirror.
Weekends spent shopping for furnitures in Ikea,
Then returning back to the comfort of our very own home.
Now though that someone is long gone,
The fantasy somehow still lingers on.

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Today i shall mourn, for my trial period with California Fitness expires. Goodbye hunky working guys and six pack abs. I shall remember you, wonderful crunch machine and super 'i really want one too' glider. Ok so i only went for like 4 times but it was enough to get me hooked. Oh and theres something about all those men coming in their working attire that just makes my heart race and melt all at the same time. I've always had a thing for older guys and i guess its confirmed now.

Too bad i'm still a poor student (damnit!) or i think i would have joined ages ago. Had to resist the urge to just swipe my card and commit to 99 bucks a month for 12 months. My mum would surely go ballistic if i did.

I was telling ad that maybe i should practice my poker skill. Winning RM99 every month was possible, no? He told me to just go find a sugar daddy.

-.-

Random Thoughts

Somethings wrong! Seems like everybody is getting into the poker fever now...or maybe its just my friends.

Seriously, everwhere i turn my head, all i hear is poker night. Maybe Desperate Housewives is making a bigger impact on Malaysia then expected.

And then i start hearing of poker sessions where people actually win/lose up to 200-300 bucks! I dont mind the winning part, but to lose RM200 on poker??? Think i'll probably end up on the floor with foam coming out of my mouth.

Of course most of them are already working but i constantly hear them complain about being broke and being paid peanuts. I think its all just a scam to scare poor students like me from wanting to graduate and taking a bite out of their apple! Hmph!

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Been going out with some ex-uni mates recently and theres this guy that really catches my interest, and no i dont mean that in a sexual way. Its just the maturity that he exudes facinates me along with a few other characteristics that i really like as well. Coupled with the fact that he's rich and i think we've got ourselves ladies and gentlemen, the perfect bachelor! However its not all sugar and spice with this guy as i listen to him talk about life working for the dad and how he has to entertain his clients. Dont think i'll like any job with that aspect and certainly praying hard i wont ever have to be in one.

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Into the second week of uni now and i'm already stressed and worried. I've built up so much expectation out of myself this time that i'm constantly worried i wont meet my target and its really killing me inside. This week alone i barely had 7 hours sleep everyday (and i really need my beauty sleep) because of all the stupid random thoughts that keep swirling about in my mind, damnit!

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Well i guess thats all for me now folks i'm to lazy and tired to type anymore lol.

Too Drunk To Type, Somebody Stop Me!

Forgive me for i am quite drunk. Its been so long since i had so much to drink. OMG i really think i'm getting too old to club :S

Anyway, i swear, i will nvr go to zouk for Mambo Jumbo night ever again. Music????? Its horrible! Nvr in my life have i danced to such horrendious music! Never again

Why does my hair take so damn long to dry?! I really want my bed...sob sob....

Sry guys for such a post but its 5am and i really dont know what else to do while waiting for my blardy hair to dry, so allow me this one time to talk cock!

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Ok my hairs dry now, goodnight folks and happy holidays! Enjoy your hols!

Night